“You may all go to hell, and I will go to Texas.” Those were the famous words of Tennessean Davy Crockett to his constituents after losing the 1831 election for the House of Representatives. Apart from me not knowing where my “Texas” currently is, that’s pretty much how I feel with all the moral mudslinging going on between the two parties. While the left was gasping over Judge Roy Moore it turns out Senator Al Franken was trying to hide the pics of him playing honk honk on the boobies of a sleeping USO performer. Meanwhile, the internet is abuzz with “hands on” Joe Biden videos trying to label him a perv and pedofile while Trump’s grab them by the “hoo ha” recording has been brought back into the discussion. If you honestly think your political party does better stuff with their wieners than the other party then you are a stupid wiener yourself. Yes, I am being childish by calling you a wiener because there is nothing dignified about making sexual assault a partisan issue. I don’t know what one’s belief on taxes or the second amendment has to do with one’s wiener. I do know that if we continue to allow partisan politics to force us to cover and excuse immoral behavior in our leadership we are doomed to simply receive more of the same.
Calling a Spade a Spade
Spare me the cries of fake news and the GOP establishment trying to hang on to power. If, as the mounting of corroborating evidence seems to indicate, that Judge Roy Moore was sleeping with high school girls while in his 30’s the dude has no place in the Senate. That’s an abuse of age, power and no claims about how it used to be back in the old days excuses it. Isn’t that right Democrats, the dude has to go! Yeah, it’s disgusting along the same lines of a 49-year-old President sticking a cigar in the vagina of a 22-year-old intern right? Then having her perform oral sex on him to the point he spills his seed all over her dress. It’s an abuse of age, power and no claims about how it used to be back in the day excuses it right? I mean I guess Roy Moore could at least pull off the old Matthew McConaughey excuse from Dazed and Confused.
How long do you want to play this game of going back and forth between the left and the right as to who does bad wiener stuff the worst? Although, the Dems get a little extra credit for a man with the actual last name of Weiner do bad Wiener stuff. Bravo on that one. You point out Anthony Weiner I point out Denny Hastert who was rapping little page intern boys and dude was Speaker of the House for the Republicans. You got a picture of George Bush Senior in wheelchair playing David Cop a Feel with some young actress and I’ll show you Al Franken playing honk the boobies on a sleeping woman.
What do you want people and how long before the moderate middle majority can be as loud as the partisan fringes? I’m laughing my butt off right now at my ultra-conservative and ultra-liberal friends trying to politicize the human wiener. Might I offer the moderate alternative that suggest if you can’t get through life without using your wiener for evil then you don’t need to be in political leadership. I’m not talking about adultery, for as bad as it is humans are flawed. I’m not talking about sexual indiscretion for as promiscuous as that might be some people just love to do it. I’m talking about the abuse of power, physical strength, age and influence to force women to do stuff with your wiener. It’s actually a remarkably low bar, but if you can’t do it you have no right to be in our leadership. It’s a big country, we will find someone else and you can then do as your wiener leads you without dragging the rest of your country into it.
It’s Time Reward the Courage of Speaking Up
It’s a known fact and for reasons I’ll let the experts try to explain, sexual assaults go unreported in far too large of numbers. As a father to two daughters, were they to report such to me and I had to watch the world scoff at their claims it would likely bring out the Samuel L. Jackson in me from the movie A Time to Kill.
Guys, for whatever reason women are speaking up in droves now as they are empowered by each other’s confession and we need to listen. We do not need to scoff at the claims of 60-year-old Alabama women because I guarantee you that there are younger women in girls being manipulated by older men right now. We simply can’t scoff at the women who had sex with Hollywood moguls for movie roles as right now, there are powerful executives preying on younger women. How society treats and receives the reports of these tidal wave of allegations matters to those being assaulted right now.
It’s On You Congress
It’s time we start rewarding the courage of women who speak up, not scoff at their claims for silly partisan gain. Al Franken, you tried to grab a woman’s boobies through a flak jacket and you gotta go. One because she was literally unconscious and two because you were stupid enough to pose for the dang picture. Judge Roy Moore, you gotta go because a 14-year-old girl has no business being next to your 30-year-old balls. You knew enough then and you certainly know enough now. Just ask former Republican Speaker of the House Denny Hastert below!
Sadly, currently congress has a slush fund to pay out secret settlements to those who claim harassment. Women who report have to go through a 30 day counseling period and all these step and then in the end a cash settlement of TAX PAYER money goes to pay these claims and we never get to know the name of the Congressperson involved. Dang people, we know more about how much money and where is spent on some clandestine operations than we do the names of members of Congress potentially harassing women.
So I’ll jump back to my original statement that if you think sexual assault is a partisan issue then you all may go to hell and I will go to Texas. Metaphorically of course because I honestly don’t know what to do with you if you think the wiener is a partisan issue. If you are that far gone down the partisan train then…
As for the rest of America we need to start demanding more from our leaders even if at that particular moment our particular partisan agenda takes a hit. Should we tarry down this road much longer then all may be lost as men of bad character most certainly sooner or later beget us bad policy and immoral leadership. I don’t care if it is Trump, Obama, Clinton or Bush, if you use your wiener for evil you cannot be my leader. We must expect better of all America or we will continue to get more of the same.
If You Think Politicians Should Control Their Wieners Like the UM Page Below