If you haven’t seen the video yet, I’m not going to link it here because the woman who’s breast was exposed by Ezekiel Elliott didn’t give me permission to do so. Did you catch that Pro-Bowl NFL Running Back Ezekiel Elliot? Keep taking notes this is going to be a long day for you. Reveling at a St. Patrick’s Day parade party as one might imagine a 22-year-old millionaire superstar athlete might, Elliot could be seen pulling down the shirt of a woman who was clearly enjoying the party herself. In fact, there are two videos one in which the young lady seems to be showing her cleavage to the crowd when Elliot again tries to pull down her shirt. In each video, the woman reacted the same way. She pulled up what he pulled down instantly and in one case actually slapped his hand away.
Now, I know what is running through everyone’s mind given the nature of the party, booze, and her own teases. We will address that but keep in mind her immediate reaction to counter Zeke’s actions seemed to make it clear she would have preferred her breast not make such a public appearance. Zeke acted and with Quantum Leak like speed, she went back in time put right what once went wrong. However, a spokesman for Zeke said “the woman wasn’t mad” and even that she hung around to party afterwards. Well there you go ladies and gentlemen, if that’s not a perfect definition of sexual consent I don’t know what is. Don’t get mad, hang around and party so you must have wanted it. smh
Implied Promiscuity is Not Consent
Growing up, most guys know the feeling of looking into a girl’s eyes after a nice date and wondering if she is giving you “the look.” You know that sigh, long stare, perhaps a bite of the lip that indicates she is giving you the green light for a kiss. It’s rarely spoken as in, “you can kiss me now” or “pardon me madam may I give you a smooch.” Rather, half the fun is in the anxiety. But for fear of getting it wrong, you move in slow and perhaps hesitate just before the lips touch. And then your lips meet in a joyous union of consenting adults. Speaking of, to my wife who sometimes reads these blogs, what do you say we put the kids to bed early tonight?
But at no point in my wanderings as a man, Marine, or human across the globe have I sat next to a woman and pondered whether she was giving me “the look” to show her breast to thousands of strangers. Oh I know this woman was enjoying a drink and voluntarily flashing her cleavage to the crowds, but you know what? She did that with her own consent. And while I would hope my daughters take a more sanctified path to their bodies there is nothing illegal about what that woman was doing. All of our opinions of her implied promiscuity are irrelevant and not a substitute for consent. You got busted Zeke, but keep taking notes because I’m not done.
Sport and College Rape Culture
Now, since my beloved Corps is currently undergoing our own little nudie pic scandal it does please me a bit to shine the light elsewhere. As a Mississippi State fan, I actually enjoyed watching the Cowboys this year due to the emergence of Dak. Moreover, while it appears Zeke likes to party like Rapey McRaperton here the dude is a beast on the field. Literally, I could see him taking every career record down the road. But what he showed us not only by his actions, but also his failure of a response was that rape culture is alive and well in sport and college. Maybe the girl just wanted to party and show a little cleavage. It was up to her and you made the decision for her.
The dude didn’t even bat an eye before pulling down her shirt like it was no big deal. Moreover, he seemed oblivious to the fact that being once rejected going in for a second shot was a bad idea. If I was about to perv out and expose a woman’s breast without her consent I would be nervous as hell. Am I wearing the right pervy trench coat, did I wash my hands, and what if there is something under there I’ve never seen before? Zeke just did it like a boss and then did it again. He clearly didn’t have her consent, but that’s ok because she wasn’t mad? Meaning consent is now relative to how pleased a woman was with the action after the fact. This is being played out on sports teams and college campuses across America and the dude is just trying to brush it off. I’m throwing the yellow flag there buddy. I mean it’s not like thousands of future athletes are looking up to you and are going to be immersed in the same culture as you, right?
Consent isn’t Feminism
If you ever doubted by my caveman writings, I wouldn’t consider myself a feminist by any stretch of the imagination. But I am a father to two daughters and a husband. Normally this is where I would say if you did this to my daughters this old Marine would come looking for you. But since Zeke is an athletic freak of nature I’m going to have to amend that to say myself and all of my beloved 2nd Platoon will be coming. Consent is a legal and moral term and it’s not feminist. Zeke didn’t have it, but it is more concerning that he still feels it wasn’t necessary to get in the first place.
Look people, from the nudie Marine photo scandal to Trump’s famous grab them by the hoo-ha to Zeke’s “she wasn’t mad, it’s cool” response. Clearly America has some work to do here. And while feminism brings up all sorts of divisive political issues ought we not to at least agree you don’t touch a woman’s boobs without her explicit permission. Speaking of to my wife, so uhm, how about getting them kids down early tonight? See that Zeke, I’m subtly asking for consent from my own wife? And always know I have it by the way she says, “let’s get this over with.”
I am not asking for the kid’s NFL career to be over, but he ought to use his platform to at least explain consent a little better to the adoring young athletes who would emulate him. I have no doubt all sorts of wretched debauchery goes on at your typical NFL party. But before you go in for the touchy, you better be sure you have that full consent. And I’m not talking about “the look” here. I mean, “pardon miss, but I would like to show your full breasts to these crowds. I mean the nipple is what they are really after. Do I have you consent and you can stop me at any point if you feel uncomfortable” type of conversation. Implied or perceived promiscuity is not consent as much rapist would love to hear it. If you had any character at all you would spend the rest of your brilliant NFL career trying to end this culture. Moves on you Zeke!
Pardon me, Do I Have Your Consent to Move over and Like the Unprecedented Mediocrity Facebook Page Below.