About a week ago, Operation Jade Helm started. I don’t know how it went for you, but for me it has been rough. I was sitting in my house minding my own business when Special Forces with gnarly beards kicked in my door and told me to quit loving America so much or they would take me to an empty Wal-Mart and euthanize me. Luckily, I was prepared as I knew this was coming and I placed a picture of Barrack Obama on my wall. When they saw it, they backed off as they assumed I was one of them. The fools! Let’s chat about tyrant Obama real quick.
President Barrack Obama
It is a charged word to say Obama, especially among the conservative community. But let us try for a moment to rise above and discuss rationally. I am not a fan of the current President as he and I, I say that like we actually chat, see the world from different philosophical standpoints. That is fine, that is politics, and that is our American right to take whatever verbal swipes we want against the President. That being said, I am still waiting for his long promised tyranny. Go ahead and comment that he will abolish the constitution and stay in power if you want. If you are correct, then I will be your B in our new Wal-Mart prison. If not, you will be mine. Willing to take that bet?
I am not saying that he has not promoted policies that could be dangerous for America. However, a tyrant doesn’t hand over the keys to the most powerful nation on Earth. And while he is not gone yet, I fully expect him to pass off power as every President before him. For those who said he wouldn’t, you better hope he is a tyrant. Because he will crush your credibility when the next President swears in. It is time for many conservatives to stop forfeiting the future of conservative thought on the idea that he will be the tyrant you always hoped. Seriously people, for some it is almost as if they want it. Do you promise if I searched your computer I wouldn’t find a photo shopped picture of Obama in all leather spanking you in an empty Wal-Mart? Because I kind of think I might. Enough about Obama, breathe, breathe, come back down from planet rage, and let us move on.
President Donald Trump
Donald Trump is a man who has lived a life where he is accustomed to getting what he wants, when he wants, and how he wants. When you think of Bill Gates, you think of Microsoft. When you think of Donald Trump, you think of Donald Trump. The man in the gold plated apartment is more likely to become annoyed with the pesky dissent of Democracy than a kid from Hawaii. Seriously, go look it up, it looks like a Saddam Hussein palace. The man who would in a week’s timespan mock a POW for getting captured and give out another candidate’s personal cell phone number as retribution seems more inclined towards tyranny than any President we have had with the exception of President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho from the movie Idiocracy. And even then, President Camacho seems like a sweetheart and would no joking aside get my vote before Donald Trump.
I understand that Trump might have said some ballsy things about immigration that many might think. I am ok with that. Yet, it has been 70 years since the end of World War 2 and we have been ruled by Democrats and Republicans nearly equally at 35 years apart. We have survived it all. With Donald Trump, we honestly don’t know where he stands on anything. So far, his policies have been against murdering and rapist illegal immigrants and he has coincidently been saying a lot lately, he supports the Veterans. So to me, when your platform thus far is your anti-rapist and pro-Veteran, you might as well be running for Student Council in your local high school under the premise you will eliminate Algebra.
Tyrant Donald Trump
So let us imagine a scary future where Donald Trump is indeed President. Today in an interview on CNN he said that if he were President that he would be nicer. To which I literally, LOL. Does he honestly believe that we would think a man would somehow be more humble, and more relatable once he has been handed the keys to the most powerful nation on the planet?
I don’t know if you have noticed these past 7 years, but the President gets verbally abused on a pretty regular basis. This narcissist couldn’t handle a few rough comments from his competitors without lashing out against POWs and consider them merely collateral damage in his pursuit of the win. In fact, I believe Donald Trump knows full well he will not win the nomination. However, that doesn’t stop him from dragging down the rest of the conservative field with him. What is a better definition of tyranny than dragging your group towards utter destruction while you sit in your bunker knowing the end is near? Yes, that was a Hitler reference and no, I am not saying Donald Trump is exactly like Hitler. For all I know, Donald Trump can’t paint for nothing.
However, his policies bother me little, but his character worries me greatly. I will not be locked up in an empty Wal-Mart by a Bush or an Obama. But a Trump, he might get me. That might be hard to hear if you support him, but consider that you like more of what he said than who he is. And with that, I will leave you with this final quote. “It is not truth that matters, but victory.” Adolph Hitler
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