I know you Iraqi Army. You may not know me, but I know you. If you are of military age now, you were likely a child when I was there with the Marines in 2003. I probably handed you candy on a daily basis and I happily watched you yell, “Saddam donkey, George Bush good!” I bought ridiculously dirty glass bottles of Pepsi from you outside the wire and watched you freak out when you thought I was going to throw the bottle away. I never let any of the Marines I served with mistreat you for I knew that one day, you would grow up to be the future of Iraq and the men we hoped would make this venture worth it. But then you apparently grew up without a pair of testicles and this whole thing is ruined. I want my candy back.
I awoke this morning to the news that ISIS has overtaken the city of Ramadi which is a mere hour and half away from Baghdad. Scenes of the Iraqi military fleeing the city absolutely sicken me when I think of the women and children that will be tortured, raped, and murdered because you lack conviction and resolve. Yes, I know ISIS is evil and violent. It is just that for Americans, that is all the more reason to stay and fight.
Now, I am not sure whether you were just hopelessly outnumbered or not, but even if that is the case, that is a sad state of affairs. ISIS fighters across the region are rumored to be on the high end of 200,000 and that is to fight across the entire region. Ramadi just had some of them. Your capital city is an hour and half drive away. If ISIS attacked at breakfast time, it seems like you should have had a few extra troops there by lunch.
Honestly, American unruly teenagers can put together a violent flash mob with more efficiency than you. Don’t you have twitter Iraqi Army? What is so hard about issuing the following tweet:
“OMG! ISIS is like totes everywhere this morning! Meet me in Ramadi and let’s get crunk on this Evil today! LOL”
That is not even 140 characters so you could throw in an Allu Akhbar or two if you want.
I think the part that angers me the most about this is that you in short fashion lost an urban environment to a rag tag force of fighters. Iraqi Army, sit down and take notes. Urban warfare is a defensive dream. Honestly, it took the advanced might of the United States military a couple of weeks to sweep through Fallujah in full. History proves that urban warfare is a hard thing for the invading force.
Think Stalingrad from history or even Kobani from this own war. You know what the difference between Ramadi and Kobani is, the Kurds had the balls to stay and fight. It is not like you didn’t know ISIS was coming. You should have prepared to grind ISIS to a bloody halt and make them fight for every street and every building. If you had the resolve to do so, children in Ramadi would not be getting raped today. Shame on you Iraqi Army, I want my candy back.
So now, I don’t know what to do with you. I don’t want to fight for land you don’t care to die for yourself and yet, the ISIS evil is so palpable it must be destroyed. I used to feel good that America was so powerful that we could invade and sweep through Iraq twice, but now I realize you were just a whore for a good invasion and capitulation is kind of your thing. I feel so dirty and cheap.
We used to give France a hard time as the poster child of surrender, but Iraq may now take that mantle forward. Why don’t you stay and fight? I could give you Mosul as that seemed to take the world by surprise, but Ramadi? Seriously, you had like all year to get ready for this and reinforcements should have been there before you could finish watching the new Avengers movies.
You have had American training and American equipment. Too bad we couldn’t loan you some American testicles while we were at it. You shame fighting men throughout history by calling yourself an Army, not because you lose, but because you refuse to fight. Mighty men have lost battles and wars, but we call them men because they fought. I want my candy back kids. You don’t rate it anymore.
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